Science fiction stories and April fool jokes often describe speculative technology we wish existed in our world. Here are a few such devices in today's fake news announcements.
New AI chip will feature enormous memory capacity and remarkable performance with patent-pending OxygenBurst™ technology keeping it from overheating. The architecture for this chip was inspired by an area rug the founder of this company bought in the eighties. Early tests show that the chip could speed through a million-sized data set when training, almost like it dumps the data before training completes. When shown a picture of a girl named “Nikki”, it mistakenly labeled it “Micki”. Yet, it was able to accurately identify applesauce with cinnamon sprinkles, even though it was mixed with a pale, watery piece of turkey breast and soggy vegetables on a Styrofoam lunch tray.
New AI chip will feature enormous memory capacity and remarkable performance with patent-pending OxygenBurst™ technology keeping it from overheating. The architecture for this chip was inspired by an area rug the founder of this company bought in the eighties. Early tests show that the chip could speed through a million-sized data set when training, almost like it dumps the data before training completes. When shown a picture of a girl named “Nikki”, it mistakenly labeled it “Micki”. Yet, it was able to accurately identify applesauce with cinnamon sprinkles, even though it was mixed with a pale, watery piece of turkey breast and soggy vegetables on a Styrofoam lunch tray.
 |  For All Fool's day of 1931, The Los Angeles Times ran a front-page "exclusive" reporting that Hamburg scientist Dr. Eugene Lirpa had discovered good health to be caused by a bacteria, "Bacillus sanitatis." Sick people that were lacking this "germ of health," could be cured simply by breathing in the same air as healthy people. Now everyone is talking about good bacteria and fecal microbial transplants from healthy individuals. Perhaps one day "good" microbial transplants could be really delivered by inhalers?  In 2004, Norway's Aftenposten posted a plan by government health authorities to implant electronic id chips under skin to better monitor peoples' medical needs. This was another April's fool, but chips like this - e.g. to monitor brain injury - are already being tested. Implanted chips are used by some employers to let their employees open doors, log in to computers and purchase food. In 1925, Hugo Gernsback invented the concept of the “teledactyle” that would allow doctors not only to see their patients through a view screen but also touch them from miles away with spindly robot arms. |
Telemedicine use has grown in recent years, although many still don't believe in automated and delivered remotely healthcare.
We still prefer a human connection, as health care information technology giant Epic suggested in their 2017 April fool's joke: unveiling "Epic TinDr," an app to allow patients and physicians to select one another with Tinder-style instant falling in love. And we may even prefer some of our health records to self-destruct - as in "Snapchart" suggested by health coaching app Twine Health “ - before they are collected by Facebook.
On April 1 2019, healthcare blog announced that Facebook formally entered the EMR business. But it's not a joke - according to some sources, Facebook planned to collect information about age, diseases, prescribed medications and visits to the hospitals. This data could be combined with all health-related information that Facebook already captured about its users.
On April 1 2019, healthcare blog announced that Facebook formally entered the EMR business. But it's not a joke - according to some sources, Facebook planned to collect information about age, diseases, prescribed medications and visits to the hospitals. This data could be combined with all health-related information that Facebook already captured about its users.
Broom, mop and cloth. Cleaning tools every home needs. Of course, you can make cleaning easier with a microfiber cloth and delegate floor cleaning to a robot mop, but you'll still have to clean small objects and patterned carpets manually with more conventional tools. This April, Google offers a new smartphone screen cleaning app. With just a push of a button, this tool will wash away all smudges on the mobile phone screen and freshen it up with a pineapple scent. This feature uses a Smudge Detector API utilizing "geometric dirt models" and "haptic micromovement generator" to clean and form a "long-lasting" dirt shield around the phone afterwards.
Science fiction authors were describing future without tedious tasks such as cleaning since 19th century. WAL-E (2008) - microbe obliterator (in the picture) was identifying dirty areas on its own, scrubbing anything and everything until it was sparkling clean. On April 1st of 2004, BMW announced a new self-cleaning car with "microscopic blowholes" clearing dust and insects. Neal Stephenson 1995 book The Diamond Age described gloves "constructed of infinitesimal fabricules that knew how to eject dirt". Not really a science fiction now, as prototype nano-enhanced textiles were able to clean themselves with light back in 2016.
Science fiction authors were describing future without tedious tasks such as cleaning since 19th century. WAL-E (2008) - microbe obliterator (in the picture) was identifying dirty areas on its own, scrubbing anything and everything until it was sparkling clean. On April 1st of 2004, BMW announced a new self-cleaning car with "microscopic blowholes" clearing dust and insects. Neal Stephenson 1995 book The Diamond Age described gloves "constructed of infinitesimal fabricules that knew how to eject dirt". Not really a science fiction now, as prototype nano-enhanced textiles were able to clean themselves with light back in 2016.
Humans were always dreaming of better transportation. In 2016, Tesla announced its first flying car Tesla shocks the world by announcing its first flying car, the Model F. EDIT. In 2012, Google announced Click-to-Teleport technology allowing potential customers to instantly teleport to the business location directly from a search ad in a matter of seconds. But it's hard to keep up with imagination of science fiction writers and producers of Hollywood movies. And each year technology jokes seem to get feebler and less exciting. Maybe next year?
REFERENCES
Samuel R. Anderson et al. Robust Nanostructured Silver and Copper Fabrics with Localized Surface Plasmon Resonance Property for Effective Visible Light Induced Reductive Catalysis, Advanced Materials Interfaces (2016). DOI: 10.1002/admi.201500632
Karim et al Nanostructured silver fabric as a free-standing NanoZyme for colorimetric detection of glucose in urine
https://www.sciencedirect.com/science/article/pii/S0956566318301970
Photocatalysis and self-cleaning from g-C3N4 coated cotton fabrics under sunlight irradiation Y Fan, J Zhou, J Zhang, Y Lou, Z Huang, Y Ye… - Chemical Physics …, 2018 - Elsevier
Samuel R. Anderson et al. Robust Nanostructured Silver and Copper Fabrics with Localized Surface Plasmon Resonance Property for Effective Visible Light Induced Reductive Catalysis, Advanced Materials Interfaces (2016). DOI: 10.1002/admi.201500632
Karim et al Nanostructured silver fabric as a free-standing NanoZyme for colorimetric detection of glucose in urine
https://www.sciencedirect.com/science/article/pii/S0956566318301970
Photocatalysis and self-cleaning from g-C3N4 coated cotton fabrics under sunlight irradiation Y Fan, J Zhou, J Zhang, Y Lou, Z Huang, Y Ye… - Chemical Physics …, 2018 - Elsevier
RSS Feed
